I Gambled Today

Gatekeeper: The Tactical Guide to Commitment

Maybe you have heard the news: men are dropping out. Word on the street is that men across the globe are unemployed, uneducated, out of shape, and above all, lonely.

I’ve learned to be skeptical of catastrophic headlines. It’s true that many boys and men are struggling for reasons too complex to discuss here, but I doubt being male is uniquely difficult at the moment. The world has always had sharp edges. Men have always faced challenges.

Still, it’s indisputable that many men are falling short of their potential for reasons too complex to discuss here. Meanwhile, women are increasingly choosing the single life. At a glance, it all seems pretty dire for relations between the sexes… but I’m optimistic. Men and women have always valued each other, and we always will.

That’s why I placed a bet today. I wagered against the downfall of men, and against the demise of meaningful connection between the sexes.

Gatekeeper begins with a simple premise. Any man who commits to a woman is offering the most valuable gift he can provide: his exclusive time and attention. Every man’s future is a priceless commodity.

Why, then, do so many men give it away so cheaply? Why do so many devote themselves to women who drive them crazy, or even ruin their lives? And why do men repeat malfunctioning relationship patterns that damage their happiness, their health, and their productivity?

Gatekeeper tackles those questions at a time when so many people are hopeless about men, and when so many men are hopeless about themselves.

The book’s recipe is ancient and reliable. It’s the same recipe men have always relied upon: You want things to improve? Good. Then get to work. Repair your relationship patterns and be the gatekeeper of everything good that flows from your commitment.

This book, at this time of pessimism, is quite a gamble—especially for someone who has the marketing acumen of a 12-year-old with a lemonade stand: hang out a sign and call it good.

Luckily, my lemonade-stand strategy has worked before. Six years ago today, I released The Tactical Guide to Women. Someone recently told me it has become an underground classic; a staple in men’s spaces alongside books like No More Mr. Nice Guy and The Way of the Superior Man.

That’s the greatest praise my book could receive. It means The Tactical Guide succeeded despite its author’s marketing ineptitude. That’s what Gatekeeper will have to do. It will need to pass the market test mostly on its own.

I think it will. I think connection matters more than ever. That’s my wager. Wish me luck because if I win, we all win.Paperback and e-book are available today at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and elsewhere. The audiobook will be along shortly. More to come…