January PsychNotes

January PsychNotesHappy New Year! Are you resolving to make changes this year? I have a couple of tips below to help you succeed. But first, the big news: Is He Worth It? releases on January 19. And guess what. You can preorder right now! Beat the Christmas rush! By nearly 12 months! If someone you know is making a fresh start this year, be sure she reads this book. …

Help! My Man Won’t Talk to Me 

Michelle sent this question via Facebook:

“I’ve recently come across some articles you’ve written on relationship dynamics, specifically situations in which men ‘go silent.’ They’ve been very interesting and helpful but there’s one question to which I’ve not found an answer…. When dealing with a man who is giving you the silent treatment for days, causing your own buttons to be pushed (and badly) what is the best course of action to take? I understand giving space to someone, but I also wonder about taking care of yourself and the feelings/anxiety that come with being ignored by a partner (not living together).”

How to Ruin Your Marriage in One Easy Step

Over the years I’ve helped a lot of couples get their relationships back on track. I’ve also watched couples self-destruct despite my best efforts. The mind can’t help but notice patterns among the two groups. I think any experienced shrink can predict with some reliability which couples will last, which ones will drift apart, and which ones will eventually donate their life savings to divorce lawyers. …

7 Modest Tips to Increase Your IQ

IQ can be raisedKeeping a fit mind is like keeping a fit body: there are no reliable gimmicks or shortcuts. Health comes down to daily lifestyle choices, like taking the stairs instead of the elevator, and being judicious with french fries and six packs. IQ, just like weight, begins with the little choices. …

Duct Tape Solutions for the Mind

Last week I had the honor of speaking with about 200 wonderful students at Northeastern Community College here in Colorado. We discussed important things, like why the mind is willing to jump through too many hoops for a free cookie. During a lively Q&A, one student asked my opinion on sleeping pills. How does a person know when medication is the proper way to treat sleep difficulties? …

The Most Important Thing to Know about Bullies and Predators

Angry little boyHey, do you want to hear a secret? I was bullied as a kid, and it was not the moderate, teasing variety. Throughout grade school I was extorted for money, chased through alleys, beaten up, and repeatedly had my coke-bottle glasses knocked to the ground. (The Glasses Game went like this: someone would knock my glasses off, after which I would crawl around looking for them. The other kids found this more amusing than I did.) …